Aug. 15, 2005 - 00:37
-
it's the middle of august, and tylenol hasn't awarded its scholarship winners. it's kind of driving me mad. i just want to know if i receive it or not. i'm not expecting it, no, not in anyway, but it sure would be nice to know whether i am to receive it or not.
i have 1. no shampoo 2. no soap 3. no body wash 4. no towels 5. my razor's blunt.
i took a shower with every scrap i had left tonight, but i'm going to have to go to the store tomorrow or else a shower would be pointless. standing underneath hot water. nothing.
i just got back from jae's. haha. i almost wrote his real name.
can you tell i'm tired much writing this? talking about my lack of sundries. scholarships. blah.
well, i just got back from jae's. i'm dead tired. well, i came home around 11. it's almost one.
i've been spending the night at his house for the past couple weeks with the exception of a couple days out of the week. such as this one. i'm going to try to test out of some of my classes tomorrow morning at boise state.
we normally go to bed, around ten maybe. one is so late for me now.
before i met him, i was such an effing insomniac. he calms me down and puts me right to sleep. it's amazing how he does that.
friday night at his house, i really believed i'd have to go to the hospital. i haven't been in so much pain in a few years. i was crying, screaming, if you know me, you know this exactly, isn't me. he held me close, kept telling me i was okay, and well enough,
i was fast asleep in his arms within a half an hour.
it's amazing his power over me-and not in a bad way. it's just amazing how he can do these things. he rights all of my wrongs.
we floated the river today with a few of my friends. we were in a circular raft with a wading hole in the middle of the raft.
one of my friend's little brothers went in the hole. i was resting on jae with my back facing my friends, and directly across my friend's little brother.
i guess jae caught the kid staring at my ass while he was talking to my friend.
jae said, "it was like he was talking to your ass. a little wierd. he kept doing that until he made eye contact with me, and then he looked away."
that's so funny. "it's like he was talking to your ass."
instead of that gawd-awful expression, "talk to the hand," it can be "talk to the ass."
i'm so tired, but i want to finish this.
i don't have the internet on weekends, and everything is so fresh in my mind right now. i don't want to wait til morning.
i've only eaten corn and two chicken strips today. i need to eat too.
i'm going to have to though. i'm so tired.